make. it. stop.

Honestly, were it not for the fact that I have a work commitment until noon I would not have gotten out of bed this morning. But if I hadn’t gotten out of bed I wouldn’t have realized that the water heater is playing games again. I’m really not sure when all of this FUN is going to end, but I’m hoping it’ll be soon.

I did get a plumber out to the house and he did something to it, in addition to getting the pilot light back on, and he said to see if that helps. While I appreciate that this only cost me $69 I can also read a calendar and see that we are dangerously close to a weekend, and not just any weekend but a Holiday Weekend. So if that fucking water heater goes out I have the potential to be well and truly FUCKED.

Anyway, we’re waiting to see what happens. I hate feeling like I don’t have any control, but it’s a damn appliance so truly, I have no control.

I’m supposed to go meet with a group of knitters tonight, friends, in a park not far from the campus. Our weather today is supposed to be lovely. Unfortunately my hip is bothering me, to the point where I’ve gotten out my TENS unit and have plugged myself in. Not sure sitting in a camp chair for several hours is a great idea at this point, but we’ll see.

Regardless of whether I go, I did start a new project just for the occasion. Does anyone else do that? Let me attempt to explain my madness…

I have several projects in the works at the same time. Some of them are much more complicated and require quiet or just music in order for me to keep up with the pattern. Some are just complicated enough that I keep the project and row count handy but I can still talk to someone or watch TV, providing there isn’t a hefty plot to follow. And then there are other projects that are so delightfully simple that I can almost do them in my sleep.

I didn’t have any projects on the needles that would be suitable to working on outside and while talking to people, so I had Lancelot help me wind up some yarn yesterday and I cast on a Feather & Fan scarf to work on. If you aren’t familiar it’s an old pattern that has a four row repeat and is quite easy to memorize. I am using a row counter on my phone just to help my feeble brains.

And of course it’s in another part of the house and I’m tied to my desk right now…

Currently on the needles in my house we have:

  • Sunset shawl – it’s just about to the lace section and needs to have the second skein of yarn wound so it’s in a pleasant time out
  • Fingerless Mitts for K – the pattern is fussy so they’re in time out until I find more patience
  • Niji vest – really just needs to be assembled, the knitting is done
  • Skewed Shawl – the pattern is interesting so it’s in the “front of the line” but it’s mohair so…
  • Ilo Shawl – gorgeous lace pattern that requires some attention, also in the “front of the line”
  • Feather & Fan scarf – this will likely stay within easy reach but since I don’t have any real plans for it I’m not worried about when it gets finished

I did go through my yarn inventory spreadsheet the other day and try to make notes of which yarns were being used for projects already, namely the ones above, and which I had purchased specifically for certain patterns. I was rather amazed to see how many yarns are already “spoken for” and I was equally impressed with myself when I went through my collection of patterns and was able to start matching patterns with yarns. Now I just need to remember to check that spreadsheet the next time I want to start a new project.

awkward and paranoid about it since the mid 1980s

I need to start with a total aside here. Why the fuck is the word “awkward” spelled so damn, well, awkward? I mean honestly, am I the only person who has to completely stop typing and force my fingers to punch those letters in that order by using every iota of force I can muster? No? Ok, moving on.

I’m out of it. Still. And I don’t like this. I feel like nothing has been “right” since last weekend and this morning – JUST THIS DAMN MORNING – was able to put my finger on it.

I didn’t feel good because of the shot so I was off work on Monday. On Tuesday there was a chunk taken out of my day to take Lancelot to get his first shot. On Wednesday I went with him for a doc appointment (nothing serious but the kind of thing that I kinda just needed to be there for). Yesterday we had to see our lawyer again to sign papers (again, nothing serious or bad just one of those “adult human” things). Then this morning I got all three of the kids in my office for awhile so we could have a new ceiling fan installed.

At one point Garth had kicked Dog Blossom so many times that he had a big tuft of her fur stuck in his toes

Needless to say, I need a rest. And a drink. But L works overtime again this weekend. So I’ll have to push through a little more before my life goes back to where it normally is. There’s the rub – nothing about this week, not one fucking thing, has been anywhere near normal and my poor little brain cells cannot cope.

As someone who has been living with a mental illness for a LOOOOOONG time, and been in remission for some time, I’ve figured out how to make life work. But a big ol’ piece of that is having routines and being able to rely on those, particularly when life gets wonky.

No routines right now = brains feel yuck = I am a grump = NO DAMN BUENO

On the plus side, tomorrow morning I’m going to visit a friend who does silversmithing and she’s going to show me/help me make a bracelet. That will be super fun. Also, the vest is still coming along nicely. I had a more experience friend confirm that my plan should work. This pleases me. I was also able to acquire a lovely bit of leather hardware stuff to serve as a closure. More on that when it arrives.

For now, I’m going to relax somewhere. Like maybe under my desk. With a cocktail.

progress

I’m still here, still kicking. I come here and think about writing way more often than I manage to actually write. Some days I can’t decide what my topic should be, but more often it’s a case of running out of energy before I find the time to try. Work is still busy and, like most people I talk to, I just don’t have the energy I once did.

Part of my difficulty is that we’re changing seasons. I have Seasonal Affective Disorder so I’m starting to feel the effects of not as much sunlight. I’ve got my little magic sun lamp thing setup on my desk now, the trick is to be here and turn it on every morning. Some days that’s easier said than done.

And part of my difficulty is the continued Rona; dealing with the plague is taking a toll on all of us.

I’m behind with the normal tasks I take care of around the house, I’m not eating great, and I just flat out don’t feel like I have any ambition. I am managing to knit, but I don’t seem to get decent pictures of it. Of course that’s due in part to having a whole tote bag full of “finished” projects that need to be blocked and have the ends woven in. That includes Waves of Happiness, so yay. But I ran out of yarn very near the end, so boo. But I had a very nicely complimentary lighter purple that I finished it with and it looks great, aside from looking like a gigantic mess because it desperately needs to be blocked.

The current project is a very simple shrug, pattern of my own devising, that will have beads on the sleeves. It’s my “stupid simple” project that I don’t have to think about. I need to figure out what my new “I need to get lost in something” project is going to be. Not like I don’t have choices.

At any rate, since I can’t show you any knitting the least I can do is delight you with a picture of the boys. This was right after Garth had started grooming Eric and right before he started chomping on his neck.